Proxy Roller

Alright, things are getting ridiculous.

For those not in the know, Wizards appears to be cracking down on the use of "counterfeit" cards; that is, cards colloquially referred to as "proxies." This has created an uproar on r/magictcg, where it's viewed as another controversy. Wizards of the Coast is, apparently, killing Legacy and Vintage.

Much drama.

I haven't seen anyone ask the most obvious question yet:

Why is this an issue, exactly?

If I wanted to race cars, and couldn't afford a Ferrari, I wouldn't obtain a fake Ferrari, show up, and expect to compete. No, if I didn't have the money, I'd race my little Nissan, or I'd spectate.

It really is that simple.

Now, I get that my perspective might be different from that of most people. But I just can't imagine being so entitled that I would expect to show up with a stack of proxies or fakes and expect to play.

A Reddit user called me entitled once, as a result of me going on record as being anti-proxy. I was called elitist and entitled for expecting my opponents to play real cards, and therefore, to play within their means. But his vitriolic attack couldn't be further from the truth.

Having been in a position during my undergrad where I couldn't afford to keep up with the (then less-frequent) Standard rotations, I get that money is a barrier to entry to play the game. In order to play, then, I had to make do. Some of my choices had to be suboptimal. As my fortunes improved, and I switched to Commander, I was able to very gradually "buy in." I picked up a Savannah for $35 in 2009, and I didn't get my last dual land until 2011, a Taiga. For eternal staples, I settled on MP, HP, and borderline destroyed (my Underground Sea had a dog-eared corner that was hanging by a thread, and looked like it did two tours in Afghanistan).

I've sat down to play a game of Commander with a guy that reeked of drugs. Reeked. Unfortunately, the city I live in doesn't really treat marijuana use as a crime, so this guy's "smoke breaks" took a while. So he comes in, and tells the table, "So, yeah, I'm running a few proxies." Not, "hey, do you guys mind that...." He assumed he'd be good to go. The reason? He'd spent too much on drugs, and couldn't afford the last few cards for his deck.

There are people out there that would be fine with this, and this pisses me off. Why on Earth would you expect someone that's bought the cards and wants to play the game to allow this? You chose to spend your money on something else; that is very firmly in the realm of "Your Fucking Problem." Period. Zero sympathy.

However, as I said above, I've been a broke student. If someone is proxying bulk rares and uncommons because they have no money, I tend to be more reasonable. Hell, I've bought cards for kids so they're playing with real cards. Money shouldn't be a barrier to playing the game, but it is a barrier to competing. That's just the way it is.

The game is playable on a modest budget; it simply takes time. If you want to play Vintage, trade into it gradually. You don't get to just decide that you want to play, and so deserve to. It's not the Reserve List's fault. It's not WotC's fault. Honestly, it's probably your parents' fault. If you want out, go. It's offensive and wrong to compare a company's defense of their IP to an "abusive relationship."

Added benefit? Everyone cashing out of the game will be selling off their cards. Might be a chance for those of us that play the game as intended to pick up a few staples.